Talking to kids about 'Gay'

April 29, 2012 19:34 by PrideAngelAdmin
gay couple Amelia from Huffington Post has recently written an excellent article about the question of talking to kids about people being 'Gay'.

In some families the introduction of LBGT family members requires finesse or lengthy explanation. I don't have one of those families. After a whirlwind romance my brother Harold and his then-fiancée Jeanne, now my sister-in-law, were addressing their wedding invitations. They had a conversation that went a little like this:

Jeanne: "You have an aunt named Danny?"
Harold: "Nope, that's my uncle."
Jeanne, a little confused: "Then you have an aunt named Rich?"
Harold: "No. Wait for it. It will click."
Jeanne: "Oh! Good for them."
That's about as complicated as we get. (Although we do still tease Jeanne about it 14 years later.)

As of today, two states have "don't say gay" legislation pending: Tennessee and Missouri. One of the reasons given for these bills is that mentioning the existence of gay people in public schools will cause parents to have unwanted conversations with their children that would require them to explain "gay." The implication is that this is a conversation that is awkward, horrible, complicated, and impossible to do in an age-appropriate way.

I've never seen it that way, but I decided to call my friend Anne, whose children are the same age as mine, to ask her if she'd ever explained "gay" to her kids. In her family the conversation started because of the lesbian couple that owns and runs our local café. Their daughters knew the couple lived together (in our neighborhood), and one day their oldest daughter asked why.

"At first my husband told her it was because they were really good friends," Anne recalled. "Later I talked to him about it, because that wasn't really the truth. We then explained to the girls that they lived together because they loved each other just like Mommy and Daddy."

Nothing horrible there.

To get another opinion I called Jeanne. My nieces are in their tweens, and she might have another take on it. "I'm thinking," she said, taking a moment to collect her thoughts after I asked. "You know, I don't think we ever had a big conversation about it. Gay people have always just been a fact to them. There really was never a need. More than anything, we talk about how bullying gay people is wrong, and how important it is to stand up for your friends."

What always baffles me about those people who fight against equality "for the sake of the children" is that they always act like explaining homosexuality to kids is the same thing as explaining homosexual sex acts to them. When I asked both moms whether they had conversations about what gay sex looked like with their kids, they were both a little stunned.

"That's not age-appropriate for my kids," Anne said, "but neither is explaining the mechanics of heterosexual sex."
"We haven't," Jeanne told me, "and the girls haven't asked. But I am sure they will. One of the girls' friends came out to her recently, so that's probably on its way."
"Do you worry about it?" I asked.
"Not really. Talking about sex with a kid is always awkward and embarrassing for them. It won't be any worse or better than any other sex talk."

The truth is that explaining to children (or anyone, for that matter) what being gay means isn't difficult. It's about love and attraction. It's about whose hand someone wants to hold, or whom someone wants to ask to a dance. It's about emotion and the way people feel. It only gets complicated when adults make it complicated, when parents and other adults try to deny the parts about being gay that aren't related to which body part gets put where, when being gay is diluted to only being about sex.

And why do people feel like boiling it down to only sex? Because then they can make it bad. They can make it about "evil" acts done by "sinful" people and vilify them. It is harder to make a villain out of the women whom the kids adore and who run their favorite café and love each other so much that they want to live together and spend their lives together.

One of the many reasons the "don't say gay" laws are dangerous is that they essentially want to wipe the existence of gay people out of children's lives. But that's impossible, because some of those children are gay people. Never mentioning that some people are gay will only make those children feel isolated, alone, and wrong. It will contribute to depression and can lead to bad decisions. Just ask anyone who has lived more than half his or her life in deep self-loathing, or the woman who married the man of her dreams only to find out after the children were born that he is gay, or any of the children driven to take their own lives because they were unable to see a future in which they could be happy. Oh, wait, you can't.

As a society, we need to get our heads out of the sand and face the fact that LGBT people are a reality in all our lives. No amount of hiding or attempting to silence this fact will make it disappear, so we might as well start talking about it and keep talking about it until everyone's response is, "Oh! Good for them."

Article: 26th April 2012 www.huffingtonpost.com

Read more about gay and lesbian parenting at www.prideangel.com

Currently rated 2.7 by 6 people

  • Currently 2.666667/5 Stars.
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5

Related posts

Comments

Monte Husseini on May 7. 2014 17:02

Stephen, I got the first letter and every an individual after EXCEPT Margaret Cho's. Can you remedy that, please?

Haselhorst on June 1. 2014 19:56

I was suggested this website by my cousin. I am not sure whether this post is written by him as no one else know such detailed about my difficulty. You are wonderful! Thanks!

Donte Carsno on June 7. 2014 01:38

Alege elegant si simplu, alege online! Rochii Online iti aduce cele mai noi colectii de rochii din Marea Britanie. Indiferent daca esti in cautare de: Rochii de Ocazie, Rochii Club, Rochii de Vara 2012 sau Rochii Office Rochii Online este locul potrivit. Preturi mici si calitate maxima, numai pe RochiiOnline.me. Reduceri la doar un click distanta. Alege eficient si elegant!

Jackie Granville on June 9. 2014 08:15

We have the worst memory! I have had a notebook/planner for a long time...I actually never know what I would do with no it!

Dominique Kopacz on June 14. 2014 13:17

Believe it or not unlike the Brits in The most effective Exotic Marigold Hotel, who want to leave England I might adore to retire to England. I like that country!

Odell Julander on June 15. 2014 09:14

What a collection, just take a moment a look on the pictures on the auctioneers web web-site. I would go-if it absolutely was not to the other side with the region.

German Alfred on June 16. 2014 18:46

Carol,br /Thank you. Which was a typo omission and is particularly now corrected. I meant exactly when you suggested.

Barney Courtright on June 18. 2014 11:36

I like this put up, enjoyed this just one thanks for publishing. "To the dull mind all nature is leaden. For the illumined intellect the whole world sparkles with light." by Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Kevin Drue on June 22. 2014 02:12

You completed a number of good points there. I did a search on the subject and found the majority of persons will consent with your blog.

Brooks Wansley on June 22. 2014 17:27

Hi JanJamm and Sam,

Bedemand Slagelse on June 23. 2014 09:53

I like the helpful info you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your blog and check again here regularly. I am quite sure I?ll learn lots of new stuff right here! Good luck for the next!

Bedemand Kalundborg on June 23. 2014 14:06

I don?t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was good. I don't know who you are but certainly you're going to a famous blogger if you aren't already ;) Cheers!

We wuz framed! on June 24. 2014 08:50

It��s really a great and helpful piece of information. I��m happy that you shared this helpful info with us. Please stay us informed like this. Thank you for sharing.

seo company on June 24. 2014 09:51

It�s arduous to find knowledgeable people on this matter, however you sound like you recognize what you�re speaking about! Thanks

Andrew A. Sailer on June 24. 2014 14:05

I am forever thought about this, thanks for posting .

Guadalupe Arbeiter on June 24. 2014 18:57

I am always invstigating online for ideas that can assist me. Thank you!

Woodrow Rosengarten on June 24. 2014 20:32

My brother recommended I might like this blog. He was totally right. This post truly made my day. You can not imagine simply how much time I had spent for this information! Thanks!

Dalton Leroy on June 24. 2014 22:59

Great remarkable things here. I��m very glad to look your article. Thanks a lot and i am looking ahead to touch you. Will you kindly drop me a mail?

Shauna Jansky on June 25. 2014 03:33

I was just searching for this info for some time. After six hours of continuous Googleing, at last I got it in your website. I wonder what's the lack of Google strategy that don't rank this kind of informative sites in top of the list. Normally the top websites are full of garbage.

Lera Michaelson on June 25. 2014 06:08

Thank you a lot for providing individuals with an extremely terrific opportunity to read from this web site. It's always so pleasant plus jam-packed with a great time for me and my office friends to visit your website at the least 3 times weekly to find out the newest guidance you have. And indeed, we're usually contented with the awesome ideas you serve. Selected 2 points in this article are basically the most beneficial we have all ever had.

Maira Vopava on June 25. 2014 18:12

hi!,I really like your writing very a lot! percentage we keep in touch extra about your article on AOL? I need a specialist in this house to solve my problem. May be that is you! Having a look forward to look you.

plantar fascititis on June 25. 2014 22:23

Löparknä, även Kallat Iliotibialbandssyndrom, är En överbelastningsskada I Mjukdelarna Hos Idrottare Som Känns På Utsidan Av Knäet.

Cordell Allara on June 25. 2014 22:30

Good web site! I really love how it is easy on my eyes and the data are well written. I am wondering how I might be notified whenever a new post has been made. I've subscribed to your feed which must do the trick! Have a nice day!

Emile Sobrio on June 26. 2014 04:08

Hello there, just became aware of your blog through Google, and found that it's truly informative. I�m going to watch out for brussels. I�ll be grateful if you continue this in future. Numerous people will be benefited from your writing. Cheers!

Michelle Hoffeditz on June 26. 2014 20:09

I would like to get across my love for your kindness for folks who absolutely need guidance on the matter. Your real dedication to getting the message all over has been astonishingly powerful and have in most cases helped most people just like me to reach their desired goals. This insightful tutorial denotes a lot a person like me and further more to my colleagues. Regards; from everyone of us.

liposuction cost nyc on June 27. 2014 05:05

I am often to blogging and i really appreciate your content. The article has really peaks my interest. I am going to bookmark your site and keep checking for new information.

chicken coop ideas on June 27. 2014 21:57

There are certainly a lot of details like that to take into consideration. That is a great point to bring up. I offer the thoughts above as general inspiration but clearly there are questions like the one you bring up where the most important thing will be working in honest good faith. I don?t know if best practices have emerged around things like that, but I am sure that your job is clearly identified as a fair game. Both boys and girls feel the impact of just a moment�s pleasure, for the rest of their lives.

chicken coop ideas on June 28. 2014 09:36

WONDERFUL Post.thanks for share..more wait .. �

Ellie Arrollo on June 28. 2014 10:23

I'm not sure exactly why but this weblog is loading very slow for me. Is anyone else having this problem or is it a problem on my end? I'll check back later on and see if the problem still exists.

Hyo Asbridge on June 28. 2014 13:19

I am very pleased to locate your website. I would like to say thank you for your precious time for producing this awesome read! My spouse and I definitely liked browsing every bit of it and I have bookmarked your page to check out new information you put up.

ou envoyer un iphone en reparation on June 28. 2014 15:19

Tid för utfört servicearbete, Tider som anges är uppskattningar baserade på normaltider. Det kan hända att vissa reparationer tar längre tid även om det är undantagstillfällen.

Pictures tell the story on June 28. 2014 15:25

Great blog here! Also your site loads up fast! What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my site loaded up as fast as yours lol

Merton H. Miller on June 30. 2014 13:23

Usually I don't learn article on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very pressured me to check out and do so! Your writing style has been surprised me. Thanks, quite nice post.

David Ricardo on June 30. 2014 13:35

You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be actually something that I think I would never understand. It seems too complex and very broad for me. I'm looking forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of it!

Billig Bedemand Sveb�lle on June 30. 2014 13:35

This is very interesting, You're a very skilled blogger. I've joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of your fantastic post. Also, I've shared your web site in my social networks!

ortopedisk medicin är diagnosticering och ickeoperativ behandling av rörelseapparatens mjukdelar, muskler, senor, ligament, leder, ledkapslar, bursor samt lesioner i nacke, bröstrygg och ländrygg. ortorehab.se

آخرين وضعيت 3 مصدوم استقلال تشريح شد معاون پزشکي و علوم ورزشي باشگاه استقلال وضعيت مصدومان اين تيم را تشريح کرد.

Andrew A. Sailer on June 30. 2014 19:17

I have been browsing on-line greater than 3 hours today, yet I by no means discovered any interesting article like yours. It��s pretty price enough for me. Personally, if all web owners and bloggers made good content as you did, the internet might be much more useful than ever before.

Fermin Nishiguchi on July 1. 2014 18:15

assos t.neopro_s7 review

Nanny Jobs on July 1. 2014 18:31

I enjoy studying and I think this website got some really utilitarian stuff on it! .

Gerry Desalvatore on July 1. 2014 18:37

Great website! I am loving it!! Will be back later to read some more. I am bookmarking your feeds also

Loraine Belluomini on July 1. 2014 20:01

clinical data warehouse sedgwick the

Jim Denzler on July 3. 2014 10:47

What i don't realize is actually how you are no longer actually a lot more smartly-liked than you may be right now. You're very intelligent. You know therefore considerably in the case of this topic, produced me for my part consider it from so many numerous angles. Its like men and women are not interested unless it��s something to accomplish with Lady gaga! Your personal stuffs excellent. Always deal with it up!

Clare Gemmiti on July 5. 2014 04:53

A round of applause for your post.Thanks Again. Really Cool.

Benton Teare on July 8. 2014 04:42

Here go some answers to questions raised above:

Kasie Hunter on July 8. 2014 12:43

Im thankful for the article post. Much obliged.

Lucille on July 8. 2014 22:45

I think if you clean up some of the grammar mistakes you will have a very well written blog post. better than a lot of m ystuff regardless.

Filip Stepien on July 9. 2014 23:22

Hi there very nice blog!! Man .. Beautiful .. Wonderful .. I will bookmark your website and take the feeds also�KI'm satisfied to search out so many helpful info right here in the post, we'd like develop extra strategies in this regard, thank you for sharing. . . . . .

Janine Hippe on July 12. 2014 08:38

Forgive my stupidity, but I can not for your life of me locate your sites rss feeds. Mind directing me to it? Thanks.

iphone 4s byte samtalshogtalare on July 12. 2014 22:24

Servicegaranti, Vi lämnar även 90 dagars garanti på reparation/service utförd av tekniker på iTech Store. Denna garanti omfattar endast de fel som servicen åtgärdade.

web font generator on July 14. 2014 13:26

You really make it seem so easy along with your presentation but I find this topic to be actually one thing which I feel I might never understand. It seems too complex and extremely huge for me. I am taking a look ahead in your subsequent submit, I will attempt to get the hold of it!

DC Towing Pros on July 14. 2014 20:39

I�ve been exploring for a little for any high-quality articles or blog posts on this sort of area . Exploring in Yahoo I at last stumbled upon this site. Reading this information So i am happy to convey that I have a very good uncanny feeling I discovered exactly what I needed. I most certainly will make certain to do not forget this website and give it a look regularly.

Andrea Yett on July 15. 2014 00:41

Awfully enlightening many many thanks, It appears like your current readers may well possibly want even more blog posts similar to this continue the good effort.

Greg Gerry on July 15. 2014 01:04

I am no longer sure the place you're getting your info, however great topic. I needs to spend some time finding out much more or understanding more. Thank you for magnificent information I was searching for this info for my mission.

hola a mi me encanta harry potter y su elenco

retirement on July 17. 2014 19:27

Hi, i think that i saw you visited my blog so i came to �return the favor�.I am trying to find things to enhance my web site!I suppose its ok to use a few of your ideas!!

Mayer Gudar on July 17. 2014 23:03

Hello there, You've done a great job. I�ll certainly digg it and personally suggest to my friends. I'm confident they will be benefited from this site.

fontfacegen.com on July 19. 2014 08:51

I believe you have mentioned some very interesting details, appreciate it for the post.

mba college in kolkata on July 19. 2014 10:10

Its really a great blog with high quality materials. I am blessed to have reach you.

Kacey Shatrau on July 23. 2014 12:11

You've shared the best collection ever. "Sleek Minimal PSD Website" is definitely an incredible PSD.

Randy Trowbridge on July 23. 2014 19:02

I couldn�t resist commenting. Exceptionally well written.

Bruno Maggi on July 23. 2014 20:27

Prezados, estou entrando contato com o departamento financeiro, mas nao estou tendo sucesso. Voce poderia, por favor, enviar-me o contato da pessoa certa?

top credit repair companies on July 24. 2014 03:52

Regards for all your efforts that you have put in this. very interesting info . "Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing." by Redd Foxx.

Comments are closed