Pride Angel

With their similarly shaped faces and shared blond hair and blue eyes, it’s easy to guess that the three boys are brothers. But Max Silverwood and half-brothers Liam and Grant come from three different families – and have nine other siblings around the world.

Their remarkable global ‘family’ has emerged after six-year-old Max’s mother Ellie Silverwood tracked down the other offspring of the sperm donor she used. The only information she had for the anonymous man was that he is Danish and had the donor alias ‘Dane 1421’.

Miss Silverwood, from Oxford, conceived Max with a donor because her now ex-husband was unable to have children. As her son grew, she began to wonder more and more about what Max’s siblings might look like if he had any. She joined the Donor Sibling Registry, a US-based website which allows families of donor children to locate each other, registering her interest in contacting anyone related to Dane 1421.

In the next two years, she received messages from nine families, who between them had eight boys – including Grant, four, and Liam, five – and three girls, all conceived by the Dane. They live as far afield as the US and Australia. Max is the oldest; the youngest is four. ‘One of the first people to contact me was Liam’s mother, Mary,’ said Miss Silverwood, a retail buyer. ‘She emailed me a picture of Liam and I burst into tears when I saw it. He was the spitting image of Max. I was really happy and excited.’ The first face-to-face meeting came when she and Max flew to Texas to spend Christmas with Grant and Liam, who have different mothers.

Ellie Silverwood and her son Max, age 6, from Abingdon. Ellie conceived via sperm donor and she has tracked down 12 half siblings to her own son Miss Silverwood said: ‘It was hugely emotional for myself and Grant’s and Liam’s families to see the boys together. ‘The similarities are uncanny. They all share what must be their father’s hair, distinctive shaped eyes, eye colour, head shape and noses. They also have the same outgoing sparky characters – and they all loved playing Angry Birds. ‘Us mothers became quite emotional thinking about the man responsible for giving us our wonderful children. All I could think was surely he would be bursting with pride if he could see them.’

She chose a donor from Denmark because far more information is given there about fathers than in the UK, where it is limited to height, hair and eye colour. As well as a full family medical history going back two generations, information on personality was also available.

She found Dane 1421 via a New York-based agency called Scandinavian Cryobank. He stood out on their list of 30 possible donors: he is 6ft, blond, blue-eyed, speaks four languages, has two degrees and plays the saxophone – and she also learned his favourite car is an Aston Martin Vantage V8. She said: ‘But what really set him apart was he’d written how he and his wife made the decision for him to donate because his own two sons were such a joy.

‘He described his love for his wife, and referred to his children as “his treasures” which I thought was wonderful. ‘I liked the fact this was an educated man who had come to a decision with his wife to help childless couples.’ With the help of a fertility clinic, she imported the sperm under licence from regulator, the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority. Miss Silverwood – who was married at the time of Max’s birth – said: ‘As he started to grow up and his personality started to come through, I found myself wondering about the donor more, particularly his two children.

‘I used to wonder if his sons looked like Max, and whether they were sporty and bright and funny like Max.’ In 2008, she paid to register with the Donor Sibling Registry. ‘Max had always wanted a brother or sister, and talked about it from as soon as he could speak,’ she said. ‘I would have loved to have another child from the same donor, but Dane 1421 was no longer donating.’

Max has spoken on the phone with two other half-brothers, Tristan in California and Nicholas in New York. Miss Silverwood hopes all 12 will get together soon, possibly in Disneyland. She said: ‘Max knows a special man in Denmark with the help of special doctors helped his mummy and these other mummies have their lovely children. Finding them has been a fantastic adventure for both of us.’

Article: 26th February 2013 www.dailymail.co.uk

Search sperm donor profiles, register now for free at www.prideangel.com

Twins Jonah and Hilit Jacobson love sushi and bite their nails. Over 2,000 miles away, twins Jesse and Jayme Clapoff also love sushi and chew their nails.

All four teens look ­incredibly similar with the same brown hair, full mouth and great athletic ability. A coincidence? Not at all. All four are the offspring of the same sperm donor and if it wasn’t for a new website that unites ‘donor siblings’ they would never have met.

Jonah and Hilit, now 16, were born and raised in ­Atlanta, Georgia, US, by Eric and Terri ­Jacobson. When the couple started trying for a baby they discovered they had fertility problems. Tests showed Eric had a condition where he didn’t produce sperm. “When you want to have a baby and you can’t, it’s hard,” says Terri, 47. “You try it all and it costs money.”

The couple’s options included ­adoption – in the US it would cost $25,000 (just over £16,000) – or donor ­insemination. ­They chose the latter. And from a brochure at a fertility ­clinic they ordered sperm from ­donor 1096. “We saw he was Jewish, ­6ft tall, healthy, bright, ­smart, sporty and worked in industrial design. He came from California,” recalls Terri. “When Eric and I found out we were pregnant, we were both ecstatic, thrilled beyond belief. “I was ecstatic to learn I was ­having twins and to find they were a healthy boy and girl. It took five years to have them so the thought of raising two was a ­blessing.” Unbeknown to them, ­several other would-be-parents liked the sound of donor 1096, too.

In California, 2,300 miles away, devoted career ­woman Janis Clapoff was heading for 40 and ­her biological clock ­was thumping. “I really wanted to have children,” she says. “But there was nobody in my life at the time.” So she decided to use a ­donor and liked the sound of a tall, sporty, clever, handsome donor. ­Donor 1096. And in a year, along came twins, Jayme and Jesse, both now 16.

This could’ve been where the story ended. Two sets of twins, living thousands of miles apart. But ­curiosity and a new website meant the twins would eventually meet. Mum Terri had always wondered whether they had other siblings. She has always been open about the circumstances surrounding ­their conception. “Eric and I used the word donor from the time the twins could talk, so it ­was a natural ­introduction for the children,” ­she explains. But while Terri wanted to know more about the twins’ ­biological father – and any ­siblings – Eric was ­less keen. “My husband didn’t want to know the wider connection,” she says. In 2000, when her twins were five, Terri joined the Donor Sibling ­Registry, a way for sperm donor family members to connect in a way they hadn’t done before.

In order to find their half-siblings — if they have any – members use the ID number of the sperm donor. After typing in donor 1096 in to the webpage, Terri found her twins’ first sibling when they were eight. A girl called Maddi, whose mum Mara – a single mum – lived in New York. However, Maddi looked just like her mum and didn’t share physical traits with the twins, or donor 1096. But Maddi was athletic like her ­half-sister Hilit. “There was fondness between them,” Terri says.

During this time, Terri toyed with having another baby and bought more sperm from donor 1096, but she failed to get pregnant. However, after spending a tiring day with her 18-month-old niece, she realised having her twins was enough. Meanwhile, Janis Clapoff also decided to find out about her twins’ dad, donor 1096, and any siblings.

She too registered with the Donor Sibling Registry and the families found each other. Then, four years ago, Janis made the trip to Georgia with her twins to meet Terri’s. “The first time they were all in the same room I couldn’t believe it,” says Terri. “They had the same body type, they even have the same Mick ­Jagger-style lips.” Hilit adds: “The first time meeting Jayme and Jesse was exciting but nerve-wracking. Since my twin Jonah and I had met Maddi two years before, we were prepared. We hugged hello and went to dinner.

“We all talked about our life at home, friends, family and interests. It’s cool when half-siblings meet because you do feel a ­connection, not like just meeting strangers.” Jayme adds: “When ­we went to ­dinner, ­we all ordered the same drink, virgin Pina Coladas. That was cool.” Jesse agrees: ­“The connection was deep. We knew ­that we were ­siblings.”

In fact, the similarities were clear for all to see. As well as looking so alike, the two sets of twins are both ­athletic, outgoing, kind-hearted ­and passionate. Two years after the Clapoff twins visited the Jacobsons in Georgia, the Jacobsons returned the favour and made the trip to Hawaii, where the Clapoffs were living. “I still can’t remember any ­awkward or weird moments between us,” Jonah says. “Jesse and I love the ocean and ­discovered ­that we both wanted to ­attend the same ­uni, which is on the beach.”

It’s the ­internet that has changed the world ­for donor conceived children. ­In the US, there are already about 7,300 sibling ­connections on the Donor Sibling ­Registry and that number is ­expected to rise. And it’s estimated that ­between 30,000 and 60,000 donor ­conceived ­children are born each and every year.

This $1billion industry is thought to be the result of ­­an ageing and even more diverse ­population, a ­society that’s putting off having children until later and advances in medicine that allow procedures like donor insemination to happen. But despite heart-warming stories like the Clapoffs and Jacobsons’, not every family is keen to meet their half-siblings. And many are less than forthcoming about their children’s biological origins.

“Having a donor father is nothing to be ashamed of,” says Terri. ­“Honesty is always the best policy between the parents and children and between the children and ­everyone else.” Terri’s view is backed up by a 2010 study, which revealed many donor children want to know more about their background. However, Terri is also aware of a recent study that warns of the ­dangers of a sperm donor being used too many times. Recently, it was revealed that one man has at least 150 offspring, raising fears of the potential for incest. “I used to think that it was a ­needle in a haystack situation,” says Terri. “But now I’m not so sure. At our sperm bank, they were supposed to cap the number of children a donor could father at 10. “But we now know there are at least 14 and probably 20 children from donor 1096.”

She adds that the industry in the US is unregulated and there will undoubtedly be some unfortunate and shocking results. However, her journey has been a good one. Terri says her twins haven’t yet shown an interest in discovering the identity of donor 1096 and the reason for this, she thinks, is simple: “Their father is Eric – he raised them.” Since the two sets of twins have met, other donor siblings have been discovered, all the result of the same biological father. When Jonah and Hilit Jacobson celebrated their Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, eight of their donor siblings showed up for the party. Jayme says: “I wish we lived closer together because we would be so much closer than we already are. We tell each other about certain things. It’s a really great relationship and I just really love them so much.”

Article: 26th September 2011 www.mirror.co.uk

Read more about donating sperm or using a known sperm donor at www.prideangel.com

A 48-year old woman who gave birth to a son through artificial insemination was shocked to learn that he has 149 siblings, with more on the way, the New York Times reported.

Cynthia Daily used a Web-based search to connect with other families who had used her sperm donor, with the thought her son might be able to connect with a few siblings one day. But she could not have imagined the extended family would amount to the size of a typical high school graduating class in the U.S.

Daily's son is not alone - more and more parents who conceived using a sperm donor are learning their children have dozens upon dozens of siblings. The sheer volume of offspring from a single sperm sample, coupled with the high likelihood that the offspring will be close in age and live in close proximity to one another, is raising concerns about the possibility that some of these children -- many who are reaching adulthood -- may unknowingly become romantically involved with a half-sibling.

The threat of accidental incest sounds like a setup for a Farrelly Brothers comedy, but for children born of active donors, the possibility poses serious risks besides the eew factor.

Inbreeding - and for that matter, large numbers of children with the same parent - can spread genes responsible for rare diseases, potentially increasing the prevalence of those diseases. And children born of incest have a much higher rate of birth defects and health complications.

"My daughter knows her donor's [registry] number for this very reason," the mother of a teenager conceived via sperm donation in California told the Times. "She's been in school with numerous kids who were born through donors. She's had crushes on boys who are donor children. It's become part of sex education" for her.

Does the Father Abraham factor point to a need for more sperm donors? It's hard to say...the issue seems to be one of perceived quality, not quantity. In sperm, as in life, some specimens are simply more attractive than others.

According to the Times report, critics complain that clinics and sperm banks "are earning huge profits by allowing too many children to be conceived with sperm from popular donors." In some countries, there are limits imposed on how many offspring a single sperm donor can produce, but so far, no such restrictions exist in the U.S.

Because women who give birth through sperm donors are not required to report the child's information to sperm banks and fertility clinics - though some do voluntarily - the most reliable resource for families who conceived through a donor is Donorsiblingregistry.com, a resource created by Wendy Kramer and her son Ryan to provide children with information about their genetic origins. Here, parents and children can connect with unknown half-siblings by entering in their donor's registry number.

"They [parents] think their daughter may have a few siblings," Ms. Kramer told the Times, "but then they go on our site and find out their daughter actually has 18 brothers and sisters. They're freaked out. I'm amazed that these groups keep growing and growing."

Some donors complain that sperm banks willfully misled them into believing the number of children they might produce. One California-based donor, who wished to remain anonymous, told the Times that he discovered he had fathered dozens of children after his sperm bank promised him the number would be no more than give.

"It was all about whatever they could get away with," he said of the sperm bank. "It is unfair and reprehensible to the donor families, donors and donor children."

Article: 6th September 2011 www.ibtimes.com

Looking for a sperm donor? Pride Angel is the only connection website to monitor all profiles and limit contact between donors and recipients, helping to limit donors who donate numerous times. Check out over 10,000 profiles and register for free at www.prideangel.com

BEING a child is hard enough. Being a child conceived via sperm donation can be even more difficult.

If the child discovers they were born this way, is it easy enough to carry on regardless or will they go down the road of finding out who their real father is?

It's a dilemma faced by JoEllen Marsh which turned her life around in more ways than one. Donor Unknown follows JoEllen as she reveals everything she went through meeting her half-siblings and, ultimately, her donor father, Jeffrey.

It all happens thanks to website the Donor Sibling Registry - it brought JoEllen and Danielle together.

But a New York Times article about the girls sparked an online search that resulted in dozens of 20-somethings coming forward because they were conceived from the same man.

Describing her first meeting with half-sister Danielle as 'weird', this is a heart-warming look at a subject rarely discussed in public.

In it we meet JoEllen and her half-brothers-and-sisters as well as 'Donor 150' aka the sperm donor, Jeffrey.

Jeffrey likens himself to a 'fringe monkey' - someone who lives on the fringes of society, protecting others from danger. He loves dogs and pigeons and lives in a rusty old camper van on Venice Beach.

A self-confessed hippy who pursued acting and modelling in his younger years, his decision to donate sperm was the result of being chatted up by a woman looking for a donor.

It brings a smile to the face listening to the 'family' talk about the similar traits they share - piano playing, same large toes, the way they push hair behind their ears.

Geoffrey's views on life and government would be considered those of a conspiracy theorist, but in truth, he is harmless.

In the end, Donor Unknown is a light-hearted look at a side of life rarely revealed and avoids focusing on the negatives and firmly shows there can be a positive outcome.

If you missed the showing of Donor Unknown 28th June on More4, why not watch the DVD, due out 11th July.

Film review: by Garry McConnachie 29th June 2011 www.dailyrecord.co.uk

Read more about known sperm and egg donation and donors keeping in touch with their children at www.prideangel.com